'That's Fine' 喺對話入面究竟想講乜

點解呢句咁難捉摸

'That's fine' 睇落係你可以講嘅最安全嘅說話之一。佢夠短、有禮貌,而且好似可以乾手淨腳咁解決一個問題。好多學習者一想快啲表示同意,或者想避開衝突,就會即刻揀呢句。

問題係,'fine' 帶住好闊嘅情感範圍。同一個兩個字嘅組合,可以代表誠實、開心嘅同意,亦都可以代表講者選擇唔直接講出嚟嘅默默失望。聽嘅人通常會睇語氣、講之前嗰一下停頓,同埋當時嘅情況,而唔係單睇字典上嘅意思。

正正因為表面同弦外之音之間有呢個落差,'that's fine' 可能會令對方搞唔清楚你究竟真正感受係點。呢種不確定,就係呢句說話值得我哋細看嘅原因。

當有人講 'that's fine',佢哋通常係想表達以下其中一樣嘢:

只有頭兩個係完全正面。後面兩個就係弦外之音所在,而且喺日常對話裏面十分常見。

一句溫暖、爽快嘅 'that's fine' 通常聽落好真誠。但一句慢、平、或者短促嘅 'that's fine',就可能聽落冷冰冰,甚至好似認命咁。佢可能暗示講者好失望,而且已經決定唔再爭論。

當佢用嚟結束一段對話嗰陣,亦可以聽落好敷衍。如果有人講出一個顧慮,而對方淨係答一句 'that's fine',就可能令佢覺得自己嘅意見被人撥開咗。喺工作場合,'fine' 通常會被理解成不冷不熱,而唔係讚許,因為其實有 'great' 或者 'perfect' 呢啲更熱情嘅字可以揀,但你冇揀。

如果你想清清楚楚畀人明白,就揀啲配合你真正感受嘅字眼,唔好留返畀聽嘅人去估。

如果你想表達⋯	不妨咁講⋯	語氣
我真心同意,而且我好開心	That works really well for me	溫暖、清楚
我批准,冇乜強烈感受	That's okay with me, go ahead	中性、平和
我接受,但有少少顧慮	That's okay, though I'd like to mention one thing	誠實、柔和
我其實比較想要另一樣嘢	I can live with that, but my preference would be...	直接、友善
我想客氣咁結束呢個話題	I think we've covered this, let's move on	有禮、堅定

一句平淡嘅回應可能收埋咗一個真正嘅顧慮:

A: I moved our meeting to 8 a.m. instead of 10.
B: That's fine.

一個更清楚嘅版本就會邀請對方坦白:

A: I moved our meeting to 8 a.m. instead of 10.
B: That's okay, though 9 would be easier for me if that's possible.

當你真心同意嗰陣,就溫暖咁講出嚟:

A: Let's try the new restaurant tonight.
B: That sounds great, I've wanted to go there.

當你想結束一個話題嗰陣,就溫和而明確咁講:

A: I still think we should change the design again.
B: I hear you, but I think this version is good enough for now.

如果 'that's fine' 係你誠實嘅感受,就加一個溫暖嘅字。如果佢收埋咗一個顧慮,就直接講出嗰個顧慮,唔好留返畀聽嘅人去估。

你朋友提議睇一齣你唔太期待嘅電影,但你又唔係好介意去。
- A. That's fine.
- B. That's okay with me, I'm happy to go along.
- C. Whatever you want.
Answer: B — 佢清楚表達出輕鬆、真誠嘅同意,聽落又唔會平淡。
一位同事提出一個令你有少少擔心嘅死線。
- A. That's fine.
- B. That's okay, though I'd like to flag that it may be tight.
- C. Sure, fine.
Answer: B — 佢接受咗呢個安排,同時又誠實咁講出你嘅顧慮。
你完全同意隊友嘅諗法,而且想令佢覺得受到鼓勵。
- A. That's fine.
- B. That's fine, I guess.
- C. That works really well, let's do it.
Answer: C — 一句溫暖、具體嘅說話顯示出真正嘅熱情。